Memos from the Middle

A Great Multitude

My evening wasn’t restful, so I decided to go back to the hospital earlier than planned. Something felt off. The soft but persistent weeping indicated much more than simply missing my husband. Nothing had ever hurt like this. Seeing him the day before, struggling to breathe, pleading without saying a word for relief from the pain I couldn’t fix, devastated me. And the doctor, who’d caught a glimpse of me passing by, moved quickly to catch up, letting me know before he’d opened his mouth that there was a complication overnight.

“There’s fluid around his heart,” he said. “We have to go back in.”

“When?” I questioned.

“Immediately.”

This was the third emergency surgery in five days. Once again, I’d be waiting in that cream-colored room with framed equestrian prints, begging God to bring him safely through. Once again, I’d be reminding God of my husband’s identity in Him. Once again, I’d be trying to stay surrendered rather than following my impulse to clench my fists tight around my problem, hoping to control the outcome as best I can.

“Then some came and reported to Jehoshaphat, saying, ‘A great multitude is coming against you…Jehoshaphat was afraid and turned his attention to seek the Lord…”
(2 Chronicles 20:2 and 3)

I don’t have three different armies banding together against me, but I do feel under siege. My current “great multitude” may not be yours, but I’m sure you’ve felt at one time or another that the enemy against you looms large, is plentiful, or is bigger than you can handle. And maybe you’re like me or Jehoshaphat, who knew that the only rational decision was to seek God despite the reality of the hardship. Perhaps you know enough by now to know that “the battle is not yours but God’s” (2 Chronicles 20:15). But how many of us would actually do what God commands Jehoshaphat and Judah’s army to do?

“You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the Lord. Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow, go out to face them,  for the  Lord  is with you.”
(2 Chronicles 20:17)

First, God told them that it was unnecessary to fight in this battle. Picture this: You know three different entities are coming against you. They won’t come to fight one at a time. No, they’ve decided to be a super foe and collectively attack you. So what did God mean when He said fighting was not needed? The key word of the verse for me is “this.” In other words, there was a battle God wanted them to fight, but “this” one–against Moab, Ammon, and the Meunites–wasn’t it. God may similarly call us to forgo a fight. Paul told us that the real battle we are in is spiritual (Ephesians 6:10-18). He also told us that we don’t fight like the rest of the world (2 Corinthians 10:3-4). The war Judah was afraid to fight was the same one God told them they did not have to fight.

Then God told them to take a defensive fighting stance. While He did not want them to fight, He did expect them to be prepared to defend themselves. He wanted them alert and ready. Today, Mike Tyson is 60 years old. By many people’s standards, he’s too old to still be competing in boxing matches. But how many of those people can attack “Iron” Mike while he is in that peek-a-boo stance? Many devils back down at a vigilant, well-prepared Christian. Oftentimes, someone’s stance makes it clear to others that she will not be manipulated, oppressed, or intimidated. How many fights might you have avoided if you’d just looked like you were well-equipped for battle?

God then commanded Judah to “stand and see the salvation of the Lord.” Consider both the physical and spiritual implications of standing. Physically moving your body to an upright position, no longer reclining or sitting, keeps you from having to scramble to your feet when your enemy draws near. Spiritually, moving from fear or self-reliance to “standing” on the word of God allows your spirit to rest in alignment with Him. From this upright vantage point, we are best able to thwart a sneak attack as well as perceive the salvation of the Lord. We see that every victory is a result of God’s saving power. And even our best fighting is nothing without the arm of God (Isaiah 59:1).

God’s final command as a result of Judah faithfully seeking him during that distressing time was to put away all fear. It did not matter that it was three nations against one. It did not matter that the combined enemy armies outnumbered Judah’s. God sent them out to face the enemy, knowing that He alone was greater than the entire multitude against them. Most importantly, He articulated that His presence with Judah rendered the formidable weak and inadequate..

Notice now how Jehoshaphat and Judah responded to God’s reminder of His presence with them:

“Jehoshaphat bowed his head with his  face to the ground, and all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem fell down before the  Lord, worshiping the  Lord.”
(2 Chronicles 20:18)

I sat alone in the waiting room and allowed myself to cry. I struggled to form coherent sentences in prayer because my emotions were so big and raw. Thinking about my husband on that operating room table again so soon after the last time arrested and released my breath erratically.

I turned on some gospel music and tried to settle my emotions. As praise song after praise song played, I found my voice, the courage, and the words to speak.

“There is no better place for Him to be than in Your hands. You are still good. This situation does not change that. I give him to You, Lord. I want my husband, but no matter what I want, let Your will be done. You are Master over our lives, and I trust You fully. And I know that You have not left us.”

Hours later, I sat on the chair facing the foot of my husband’s ICU bed.

“By the way, did you get all the fluid from around his heart?” I asked the physician.

“When we got in there,” she said, “we couldn’t find any. We don’t know what happened to it.”

“When they began singing and praising, the Lord set ambushes against the sons of Ammon, Moab, and Mount Seir, who had come against Judah; so they were routed.”
(2 Chronicles 20:22)